The bad idea that got away.

Some of the best bad ideas will never see the light of day. We'll never know how this one would have worked out, but it had boldness and fire. Its tremendous potential will go untapped.

Two friends of mine, Iris and Suzy, (names changed to protect the guilty) were discussing the handsome residents of Suzy's apartment complex over beers at the bar next door. The building's friendly security guard soon joined the conversation and talk turned to one comely young man in particular. Little is known of this specimen, except that he has been seen wearing Sperrys.

The three quickly hatched a plan to write the boy an oblique secret admirer note to be delivered by the security guard. He's always up for adventure. The note was perfect. "Hey ... you live here, and my friend lives here too," it began.

But this seemed too forward and the unicorn drawing above soon replaced it. Even this had problems, as Iris was the boy's admirer but the unicorn was the work of Suzy's hand. It would have diluted the meaning of the gesture. The gambit was abandoned.

I'm mournful about this. The plan was very nearly my platonic ideal of a bad idea. Both because it could have made a random stranger's day and because the possibility was there for embarrassing repercussions on the level of Shakespearean comedy, maybe even tragedy.

To console myself, I confiscated the evidence.